I've been wondering quite a bit about who i am based on who i am around.

Because to be honest, of my circle of friends i hang out with, I only choose to be around two of them. I'm often accidentally insulted by them, often they dont want to talk to me, and other times they just make me feel really rubbish.

I mean, i have great friends outside of these. Sadie for one, who is awesome, but even Leila, who i am actually in love with right now...When i spoke to her about how rubbish my mates were making me feel, she instantly without heasitation told me that i was welcome with her friends any time. I dont know her well, and yet she extended her close friendship group to include me without a doubt.

I had Roseanna, possibly the greatest friend I've ever had, but she's left now. Im gonna miss her.

I have the guys i guess, but i would never be able to hang around with them, we'd annoy each other too much =P

Im also scared of major change in things i hold steady.

I wonder if its whats making me so insecure about myself....

But Im stayng wth my friends, despite the comments and despite the way i feel afterwards.

I dont know what else to do.