Today was the chemistry exam.

It was also the day that i found myself feeling majorly insignificant.

And a tad clever.

This morning on the bus =D
"Oy! Whats a correlation..?"
"Um...Its one of them uh, relationship fings innit? Like a marriage."
"Oh alright."

Lolage =) Bless the chavs =)

The exam didnt go too badly i guess. I think i can happily aim for an A with that exam, a few i didnt know- which, wierdly, were the tick boxes ones- but i think for the first time i revised properly in a way that suits me and not anyone else.

Now i need to learn the whole of modual five maths for tuesday...

Meh. I dont know how the year 11s do it, i really havent the energy to carry on.

And I dont quite know whats happened to one of the guys at school. There was a time when we were really close friends, and he was honestly like my little brother- annoying but we were friends despite it.
Suddenly he's got the game that most of the guys have. World of Warcraft.
I blame it on the game, cause thats when i noticed it, but its probably my fault somehow.
Because from that point on, he hasnt wanted to talk to me, or if he has, its only cause he has to.
And I dont mind him talking about it, i pretend i do but to be honest, each to their own and if he and mike and matt want to spend their time discussing it, who am i to disagree?

But its got to a point where when i turn away from them because they talk about it, or talk to someone else when i know i'm not welcome in the conversation, he gets annoyed or huffy at me.

He used to come and see me - on the pretense of seeing me at least, which actually means that he came to see me to get into the good books of my friend, who he liked- and now he comes in occasionally to talk to Mike. Its not jealousy i feel, its irritation, how he comes in and the first thing he says, instead of hi is "Wheres Mike?". Half the time i just sit there and wish for a hello. Or a How are you. I want to scream "Im your friend too!".
Or He'll laugh at how i dont understand, or make comments deliberatly to make me feel stupid. I have never felt, whilst in the middle of a conversation, whilst being hugged at the same time, as if i am not welcome whatsoever. When he talks to me its as if he's talking to someone he has to talk to but hates.

I dont know. He just always talks to me in a really condecending way, as if he's only talking to me because he has no other choice and resents that fact.

To be honest its really bugging me. I dont care if he's smarter than me, or has this game, and in school, it rarely seems to make a difference. Until reccently, whereas now its his tools to make me feel useless. He brings it up that he's smarter, or takes credit for an idea, or makes fun of me for not knowing something geekish.

And im not even sure he means to do it.

But its irritating me now. Im pretty calm about this sort of stuff, because often its a phase, or i've done something to upset them...

Now, talking to a guy who was once like my best friend, makes me either want to punch him, or go crawl in a hole at my own uselessness.

I dont know exactly what I need to do to regain his respect, im not too sure tbh what i did to lose it, but im fed up of it really.

Im tired of being second best.

Meh.