I have been thinking about God reccently.

Not for any particular reason.

Nor do I have any wish to go back to GBC any time soon, (Though I hope to change at some point and actually go back to a church).

However it has been on my mind more and more since going to Lauras church.

Which continues to get to me at the moment...

I mean, I disagreed with the points made in the youth service. The alternative looks at the Prodigal Son, though interesting, made the tale different, and so it lost its meaning. I was gonna argue, but I thought that rocking the boat in a place I've only been once, with the best friends of the girl I was staying with, would have been a bad idea.

But the worship was real. For the first time I believed people when they were singing and playing.

Then the best church I've ever been to- out of the cold, in someones house, where a guitar was picked up and played.  God was talked about, but really it was just a bit of a jam session.

It was nice y'know? Just to spend a few hours in a place where God was the topic centered around. Like at Soul Survivor.

But since then, I've been a bit...Weary.

As much as I adore my christian friends, alot of them just tell me to pray out my problems, which to me, isnt a solution unless you're actually wanting to pray. The fact that I so rarely let God into my life means that I don't want to open a channel with him for communication.
I don't know why. I just don't.

But then I seem to be getting very defensive of it. I've begun to get very angry at a friend of mine, who yells at me for being a Christian, yet was once one supposedly, and has no facts to back up his reason for hating me, other than someone pissed them off in church.
It gets me very annoyed. And It shouldn't bother me.

I mean, I disagree with so many aspects of church. And yeah, alot of mistakes have been made over the years. But as people sit there and slag off religion, they don't realise its all the same as what's happened with other institutions.

Its like in history, we learnt that alot of medical progression was slowed from the middle ages onwards, because the church agreed thoroughly with the works of Galen. Though alot was right, much was wrong, but because he was spiritual, the church didn't want people to experiement- though its more likely they discouraged experimentation for the safety of those involved.
But this was, of course, a chance for everyone to complain that the hospitals set up by the church were pointless, useless, needless. Another thing religion was useless in, and another reason why It shouldn't exist, as its only caused trouble.

Well...Sure, they got the wrong idea. But the government didn't bother with health. The church was the only institution in the country that bothered to set up hospitals and care for people in the first place.

Then you've got the fact that people blame Christianity, or Religion, for wars. They say that every war can be traced to religious intent.

Well okay, the crusades, in the freaking MIDDLE AGES, I can agree with. They were for dominantly religious reasons.

But even the Irish Troubles, which has been dubbed a religious war...Well, its not really. Its just easiest to distinguish the invaders from previous land owners, by the fact that one side is Protestant and one side is Catholic. Their fighting isnt over religion, its over land.
Same with the overseas wars. Its pretty much entirely territorial, but because of the difference in culture, that is what is picked up on.

So, I conclude my very pointless religous rant with the greatest movie of all time.
Well, for now any way.

Prince Caspian :)
I never really liked the Lion Witch and Wardrobe film, but the Caspian one I adore. Its my favourite book too :)

Anyways, I watched it yesterday. I think it's one of the few films that I watch the whole way throuhg without fastforwarding the rubbish bits.

And the amount of care Lewis put into it...The wisdom that comes from a freaking friendly Lion...Is amazing.
I love it. The fact Caspian is ready to be King, purely because he is humble enough not to feel ready. The fact that if you didn't know Lucy had gone to find Aslan, the help that they get from the Trees could be seen as chance- which in real life, how much is God that we don't know about? The fact the older ones don't see Aslan even though they want to, because 'Maybe you weren't looking'.

Even the song at the end...Regina Spektor, The Call.
I don't like her. But Sophie insisted when it came out that I listen to The Call, so I know it, and because of Sophie, have some affection for it.
It has faith connotations with it, whether it meant to or not....

It started out as a feeling

Which then grew into a hope
Which then turned into a quiet thought
Which then turned into a quiet word

And then that word grew louder and louder
'Til it was a battle cry

I'll come back
When you call me
No need to say goodbye
Just because everything's changing
Doesn't mean it's never
Been this way before

It intruiges me, and speaks to me, and I love it :)

Anyways, I've done now. Sorry =P <3