In the mostly Jamacan Big Brother Household.

Still on Wheezy.
I had just typed- who isnt as loud as yesterday. But then it decided to growl at me, so its deffo still got the attitude.

Sigh. I worry myself sometimes.

Anyway, I haven't all that much to say, but am very determined to continue blogging, so I'll babble for a bit and then maybe write a letter :)

I was gonna talk about Church for a bit, but have been told off for being too Preachy, so I'll leave it out for a bit.

Which leaves me with not alot else to say really. Not all that much in the mood for writing, and I'm also not sure what time Merlin starts.
AH! I know what I can babble about!

So my cousin had a baby, a beautiful boy named Ryan Jacob. As much as I lose out on seeing her, I adore her kids, Luke is about two, and Ryan is only a few weeks.

Luke is gorgeous. He's such a sweetheart, I don't even know why I'm so attatched to him, especially considering I've only met him three times. Whoopie family politics.

Ryan is...Okay, I'll be honest, babies physically are not pretty. Theyre all small and scrunched up for a bit. But I do adore him.
Usually I refuse to go anywhere near them until they're about a year and half. See them? Definitely. Hold them in any way? Nope, they're breakable.
So when Hannah dumped this kid into my arms, I was a tiiiiiiiiiiny bit uncomfortable.
Like, I would have pegged it had I realised thats what she was going to do

But I loved it :) He was sleeping and so totally peaceful, which is probably why it was so uneventful, but it was really lovely.
Though in no way does this mean I'm gonna go jump somebody for one.
Or turn into a worm like Roseanna.

Anyways. Letter time. Mopey, to match my mood :)

Dear Friend.

I love you masses, and though we'll never be quite family love, or any other type of love, I trust you with alot of stuff, and you know more about me than most people do...
I just really wish you'd stop judging me for it. You tell me about stuff that happened when you were my age, and put down everything I feel or do. I swear sometimes you look for ways to judge me.
I trust your input massively. Generally I'll go with what you tell me to do, because usually its dead on right. But you've started to make me scared of myself and my decisions.
I'm a teenager who screws up alot. Just because you made the same mistakes, or were too perfect to, does not change how they are for me.
I'm not mad at you. But nor can I talk to you any more. I just wish I didn't have to be scared of you.
Charlie xxxxxxxxxx